Bears Make Women Get Wild…

So, I saw an ad on TV for “Vermont Bears” or something. They are plush Valentine’s Day dolls. And, if I am to believe the ad on TV? These plush bears will make women putty in the hands of men.

Apparently, women are unable to control their sexual urges when given one of these bears. The ad is peoppered with women cooing and suggestively talking about repaying their man for getting them these little teddy bears.

All you morons buying roses and having a candle lit dinner aren’t going to enjoy Valentines as much as the men who buy their sweethearts one of these bears. Nope. You won’t. While she might think that your roses are sweet, the guy who gave the bear is going to see his sweetheart turn into a naughty sex kitten. Really. The ad says so.

I am going to buy several women these “Vermont Bears” this Valentines just to try my luck. Boy, is my Valentines day going to be exciting! Uh, all in the interesti of testing the truthiness of the ads. Yeah. That’s it.

Posted in: Pop Culture, Satire

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