Bond Girls, Owen Wilson & Fox News

Newsflash! Fox & Friends Host Declares Ted Kennedy a hostile enemy combatant! Way to be “fair and balanced”, Gretchen Carlson! Making Minnesota proud.

I don’t consider it a good sign when I sleep through more than half a movie and at no time do I feel the need to jump back and watch what I missed so as to “understand” what’s going on when I actually wake up. Consider that the closest thing to a review from me of You, Me & Dupree.

Continuing my favorite stuff from Bond, I go to the other regular part of a Bond film. The Bond girl. Bond girls serve multiple purposes, the most obvious being eye candy. They also exist as a simple plot device to move the story forward, to provide info that would have been much harder to get otherwise and to give Bond a chance to be smooth.

My criteria is that they be more than pretty, have a reason for being in the story other than as Bond’s love interest. That can certainly play a role, but I am thinking that their motives need to be personal beyond wanting to sleep with James. Whether they are in the story out of vengeance, devotion to homeland or something along those lines, that’s what I want to see. And finally, my criterion requires a skill beyond looking pretty in slinky dresses.

Beware of spoilers for films that are over 20 years old (some are passed 30 years). Proceed at your own peril!

1.Domino
Thunderball

For some reason, Domino has always been one of my favorite Bond girls. Yes, Honey Ryder (Ursula Andress) walking from the ocean is iconic. But for my money, Claudine Auger’s Domino swimming in the ocean, ever so gracefully, is far cooler. That one piece with the mesh strip isn’t to bad either. But part of what I like about Domino is she is not the traditional Bond “bad girl gone good”. She is apparently pretty decent, and notquick to throw herself as Bond’s feet, rejecting him and skeptical of him in their first meeting. While she has ties to the villain, she is not the villain’s girlfriend or henchwoman. He is her guardian. And when she discovers that her brother is dead because of her guardian, she is willing to turn her back and join Bond, and she isn’t a weakling.

2. Tatiana Romanova
From Russia With Love

Tanya is interesting as a character, because she is working for the bad guys-but is under the belief she is working for the good of her government (The Soviet Union). Played by the lovely Daniela Bianchi (Miss Rome and Miss World 1960 runner up), she seems taken with Bond and him with her, and while she is being duped by Spectre, she is charming enough that you kind of forget that little fact. Yeah, if you analyze it too much it’ll make you annoyed. She’s a top agent, but is unaware that her Superior is no longer working for Mother Russia? I also note that Daniela’s casting goes against a Bond choice of later years with most Russian lead women being raven haired.

3. Vesper Lynd
Casino Royale

Vesper was an interesting character to me. I don’t dare share to much, as this one is from the newest film, still in theaters. I will say that Eva Green plays Vesper as complex, intriguing, smart and tough to read.

4. Dr. Holly Goodhead
Moonraker

Lois Chiles plays one of those typical “hot scientists/astronaugh/CIA Agents” that inhabit the world of James Bond. But unlike the World Is not Enough’s Denise Richards, you can believe Holly is a competent agent. She has really cool gadgets as well, like a perfume bottle flame thrower! What woman wouldn’t want that?!

Posted in: Movies, Politics

2 thoughts on “Bond Girls, Owen Wilson & Fox News Leave a comment

  1. Mr. Kennedy,your list of your favorite Bond girls shows that you have class and the ability to see though the cleavage and see what makes a real woman.Claudine Auger is also my favorite Bond girl and you can’t go wrong with Daniella Bianchi either.But I was surprised, and impressed, that you have Dr. Holly Goodhead (Lois Chiles) in your list.In other lists she is usually overlooked and placed near the bottom.I can’t imagine why,that look that Lois Chiles can give you is just so sexy.Plus like you hinted at, she is quite capable, smart, and independent.If I had to edit your list I would replace Vesper Lynd and instead go with Lois Maxwell as Miss Moneypenny.She gets me everytime with those rebound lines to Bond.And I often think if I were a double agent at MI6 working with Bond that I could be the man to take her out for a date and end her lonely days and nights.Once again, you are an excellent judge of Bond girl appeal and your list is one of the best (and hardest to find, unfortunately) and I wish you luck and happiness in all that you do.Au revoir

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